(no subject)

[theyellowhobbit]

I survived the GREs. The bus was late. I had a bit of trouble finding the suite. But still I got there early, and had some time to relax.

I started the test. After the 2 essays, I got a 10 minute break. So I left to go to the bathroom, and the bathrooms are outside of the suite. Unfortunately, when I walked back the door was locked. I spent some time knocking on the door and panicking, since you get penalized if you go over your 10 minutes. Eventually someone let me in, I grabbed a quick bite to eat, and went back in.

Since the GREs are a computer test, you find out your scores right away.

I got a 700 in math.
I got a 570 in verbal.

Obviously I should have started studying sooner. But even so, I don't know how much it would have helped. I lack the ability to do well on analogies. It's just not my thing. Though maybe I could have gotten more of the antonyms right had I known more words and their meanings. Unfortunately you can't omit questions on the GREs.

Now I feel like all of the time that I did put into the GREs (Friday busride, Sunday night, Monday, and Tuesday) was wasted. I isolated myself and put myself through this insanity for nothing. And now I have to do even more work on the thesis. I need around 2000 words today if I really want to take NaThWriMo seriously. But I still need to do more research, and that doesn't count towards my word count.

When I got to the anthro museum after the test, I checked my e-mail. I received an e-mail back from the director of the Ein Gedi dig.


Dear Rachel Adler,
Thanks for your Email.
We do need volunteers for the excavation,
see: planetnanana.co.il/ghadas/
Sorry, but we did not find a Mikve, yet.
Sincerely,
Gideon

*Emphasis added.


Sorry to waste your time, maric23. But I do appreciate your help.

I probably can't volunteer, because that costs money, and I've used up all of my grant sources. So unless someone is really nice and wants to buy me a round-trip ticket to Israel, there's no way I'm going this winter. I've been fighting against the inevitable.

I suppose I'm no worse off than I was before on that one, but I feel kind of embarrassed that I asked about staff positions, even though it wasn't like I did anything wrong.

Now I feel doubly disappointed. The Ein Gedi thing just added insult to injury.

I know that I have the ability to write a really great thesis that will impress grad schools. I know that my grades are pretty good, especially within my major. I'm coming from a good school. I have a lot going for me, but still the GREs make me feel stupid. They feel like an immutable assesment of my thinking processes, an evaluation of my inherent intelligence (or lack thereof). I know in reality this is not the case, that the GREs only evaluate how good you are at taking the GREs. I have no problem reading anthropological sources and understanding them and discussing them. I have no problem interviewing people and doing ethnographies. I'm good at digging, and recording, and taking elevations, and washing pottery and bones. And waking up at 4:45 AM. Shouldn't all of those things matter more than the 570 in verbal?

Bar Ilan, Hebrew U., and Harvard Divinity do not require GRE scores. If I only applied to these 3 programs I might be able to get away with not retaking the GREs and subjecting myself to this torture again.

I really should take the rest of the evening off and relax after my mashing shift is open. But I doubt that is going to happen.

Comments

[nesheekah.livejournal.com]

I'm no expert in archaeology programs, but most institutions value other aspects of candidates way above their test scores. I mean, you have a great GPA, so it's not like you'll come across as an idiot.

When I applied to UJ and then RRC, it was apparent that the GREs were more of a formality than anything. I had similar scores to yours, except reversed, and I still got in, and no comments were made on my scores.

You could always take 'em again, and I'll help you with the analogies if you want. They're not so evil when you strategize.

[sen-ichi-rei.livejournal.com]

I probably will retake them again. So if you could tutor me on the verbal that would be awesome. I guess e-mail me and we can figure out when we're both free and other logistical things.

And what kind of kippah would you like?