Jews in the Woods?

[theyellowhobbit]

I was planning on going to DC [and by DC I mean West Virginia] this weekend for Jews in the Woods, despite the fact that desh is a bum and isn't going.

Now I have to go home to RI on Sunday, to visit my very sick Grandfather. I might be able to fly out of Baltimore, if I can get to the airport, which I think I can. I'm pretty good at metro-ing now.

So actually, what I thought was an issue really isn't. There are plenty of flights, and I don't need to come in on friday and I can still go to Jews in the Woods. Huzzah!

Meanwhile, my exams and going to Raphi and Dassi's wedding is all in flux. The flights get pretty expensive this close to departure. The ones for sunday are 91$!!! [normal airfare is 29$. I'm spoiled.] But my parents are paying for it, and they're the ones telling me to come home, so this time I don't feel guilty. If Jon went to a school he had to fly to, he, too would be spending tons of money on plane tickets.

There's all this stuff that I have to think about yet am not allowed to plan for, and
I'm afraid I'll have a situation like I had a year ago when I needed extensions in practically all of my classes. At least Jewish Studies 320 is ALL DONE!!! [Professor Fishman said I did a good job facilitating. Really, Mordechai Kaplan is just so controversial that no one could stop talking, thus making my job easier. All I had to do was call on people, which I'm very good at doing.]

I'm not sure how I should be feeling right now besides overwhelmed. I'm not sad, at least not sad like I get when I'm depressed, and here Grandpa is, critically ill. I feel guilty. Like growing up we spent a lot of time with my grandparents, but recently I haven't seen them that much. And there was the feeling of distance that I've had since Freshman year, when I was back for december break and they came to watch me read Torah at Temple Habonim, and Grandpa told me not to eat too much at the oneg because I'd get fat. I was very hurt by that comment. And now I've lost a little [not a lot by my own standards] weight and they're "so proud" of me. Gah! I don't need you commenting on my weight either way! It's none of your business what I weigh. The same thing goes with grades. Like their love is dependent on how much/little I weigh and how many As I get. "I bet you got straight As" Grandma said. Don't make assumptions like that, because I don't get straight As. I haven't since sophomore year of high school, my only straight A year. All the other years I'd have a B+ somewhere, or even a B if the class was hard.

And then I feel like a horrible person that this has been my relationship with my grandparents for the last 3 years.


**edit** I messed up an lj user tag, and as a result, the rest of the entry was hidden. silly lj.

Comments

[jtersesk.livejournal.com]

Is this a fill in the blanks game?

...DC is not in West Virginia?
...you hate the woods?
...Jews in the Woods is not this weekend?
...it might snow?

:-P

[sen-ichi-rei.livejournal.com]

I fixed it, as you can now see. the lj user tag messed it up.

[masteraleph.livejournal.com]

As someone whose direct flights home run well upwards of $300 round-trip, I have very little sympathy for $91 being too much one-way.

[sen-ichi-rei.livejournal.com]

but 91 compared to 29!!!! that's needlessly insane! that's a 62$ price increase!!!!!

[levana-b.livejournal.com]

Yes and you know what the funny thing is - people will pay it. So they can get away with it. Evil people getting their way and all that.
~Liz "some of us don't need to fly" Shayne

[(Anonymous)]

well i can't not pay it. i have no oither way to get home that would be less expensive and get me there in time...

Jews in the Woods!

[kressel.livejournal.com]

I LOOOVE the sound of that! I wish I could go.

Refua sheleima to your grandfather. I am sure both your grandparents love you for more than your weight or your grades. They were tactless, but so what? Your grandmother meant something nice when she said she was proud of you. So chalk it up to insensitivity on their part and forgive. Perhaps you can even explain to her why it hurts you, but she might be too preoccupied with your grandfather's illness now. It's your call.

May your grandfather have a refua sheleima. What's his Hebrew name?

Re: Jews in the Woods!

[sen-ichi-rei.livejournal.com]

I don't think it's your type of thing. It's a shabbaton that is pluralistic. I'm probably one of the frummest people going.

my grandma is pretty much set in her ways, and I doubt I could explain why she's hurting me by what she says. And now I feel guilty because I haven't lost any more weight over the past 2 months, and i think that my whole family expects me to...

My Grandpa's name is Coleman ben Esther.

Re: Jews in the Woods!

[kressel.livejournal.com]

Health crises tend to draw away everyone's attention from everything else. It might be that your family, and especially your grandparents, won't even notice.