Isn't that what libraries are for?
Feb. 3rd, 2004 08:04 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
theyellowhobbitAfter abnormal psych class yesterday, I decided to put my resolve to the test. I went into the library, because very often Sean is there. And sure enough, he was.
I sat down and talked to him for an hour. Unfortunately, he's still just as nice, sweet, and wonderful as ever. But We had a good conversation. Nothing went awry.
On the subject of bashert {to reply to Ari's response}: One of the things I've considered lately is the fact that in the Reform movement [though I bet Conservative is the same way] if you want to be a rabbi, you can't marry anyone who isn't Jewish. Now considering that, suppose Sean had decided the long distance thing could work. Suppose one day there was talk of me going to Rabbinical school. (Well of course there would be..) Anyways, I'm the kind of person who could never ask someone to convert for me. So I would choose Sean, or maybe some hypothetical other guy, over being a rabbi, though I would still raise my kids Jewish.
Though I have no problems with this decision, maybe G-d really does want me to be a Rabbi. Though that would mean that G-d accepts female Rabbis. I think G-d does...but someone from an Orthodox persepective would probably disagree. But why is it G-d's decision whether I become one and not my decision? How can I possibly be a good Rabbi without being happy first? If I'm supposed to be compassionate when giving advice, I can't very well be self-centered and focusing on my own troubles. Not to say that Sean is the only guy in the world who could ever make me happy...but he was the very first one to accept me for who I am. And I don't know how many other guys will do that. Sean showed me that I am, in fact, loveable, and for that I will be eternally grateful. But how many guys like Sean are there in the world?
I sat down and talked to him for an hour. Unfortunately, he's still just as nice, sweet, and wonderful as ever. But We had a good conversation. Nothing went awry.
On the subject of bashert {to reply to Ari's response}: One of the things I've considered lately is the fact that in the Reform movement [though I bet Conservative is the same way] if you want to be a rabbi, you can't marry anyone who isn't Jewish. Now considering that, suppose Sean had decided the long distance thing could work. Suppose one day there was talk of me going to Rabbinical school. (Well of course there would be..) Anyways, I'm the kind of person who could never ask someone to convert for me. So I would choose Sean, or maybe some hypothetical other guy, over being a rabbi, though I would still raise my kids Jewish.
Though I have no problems with this decision, maybe G-d really does want me to be a Rabbi. Though that would mean that G-d accepts female Rabbis. I think G-d does...but someone from an Orthodox persepective would probably disagree. But why is it G-d's decision whether I become one and not my decision? How can I possibly be a good Rabbi without being happy first? If I'm supposed to be compassionate when giving advice, I can't very well be self-centered and focusing on my own troubles. Not to say that Sean is the only guy in the world who could ever make me happy...but he was the very first one to accept me for who I am. And I don't know how many other guys will do that. Sean showed me that I am, in fact, loveable, and for that I will be eternally grateful. But how many guys like Sean are there in the world?
